simplymi

我不求

2011-10-09T21:54:00.002+08:00

我不敢祈求，祢赐给我美丽的容貌，只求祢，赐我善良的心；因为善良的心不会变老。我不敢祈求，祢赐给我富贵之道，只求你赐我丰富的爱；因为爱是生命珍宝。我深深知道，唯有经历各样缺陷，我才能更加感受，祢恩典围绕；我才能珍惜生命的美好！我不敢祈求，祢赐给我平坦的路径，只求祢，坚固我的信心；因为信心超越艰困的环境，信心超越环境。

By Grace

2010-01-10T20:07:00.017+08:00

2009-A year brimmed with God's grace.
There are no lexicons gargantuan enough to describe His mercy,
nothing wide enough to contain His copious love.
His promises never fail to allay my apprehensions of the future,
the vicissitudes of life which i encounter daily and
whenever i feel that i was left alone to take the bull by the horns.

Just like a song which i learnt in chapel during my alma mater days,

He's the Lord of the sunshine,
the Lord of the rain,
He's the Lord of the good times,
the Lord of the pain.
He's the Lord of the mountains,
the Lord of the sea,
He's the Lord of the music,
the Lord of the children,
the Lord of,you and me.

Everything in a nutshell, with a memory that holds last year.

reflection

2009-11-08T21:20:00.005+08:00

Look at me, I will never pass for perfect bride.
Or a perfect daughter.
Can it be I'm not meant to play this part?
Now I see that if I were truly to be myself,
I would break my family's heart.

(Chorus:)
Who is that girl I see
Staring straight back at me.
Why is my reflection someone I don't know
Somehow I cannot hide who I am,
Though I've tried.
When will my reflection show,
Who I am inside.
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside.

Mulan
by Lea Salonga

2009-10-26T21:42:00.015+08:00

Been zonk out by heaps of work,commitments and exam preparation that i left my blog dilapidated.
nevertheless,still thankful for His sustaining grace and love.
Recently, i'm apt to diagnose myself with GAD(generalized anxiety disorder) which has comorbidity with insomnia.The left bottom of my eye had been throbbing intermittently for 4-5 consecutive days.wonder why...??
Could it be that my eyes are simple too dry with contact lenses on the whole day which is made worse without restful nights?
Been having weird dreams too,
one of those i vividly registered was being forced to marry a guy whom i didnt love.
I can't remember how he looked like, what i recalled was that he brought those usual wedding endowments, the calendar to choose an auspicious date,together with the most horrifying- the seamstress ,to take measurements for the wedding gown. If i'm not wrong,i woke up having some tears in my eyes.

Joint pain,headaches,dark eye rings,all evidence of precocious aging,
a sign of woman's expiry and the heavy traffic of weddings to attend o.o'''

A need to find equanimity.Miss times where i can just be still and alone, to do what i enjoy; reading,baking,practice piano and a morsel of violin...

...which reminds me that i've got to replace the bow.

i'm starting to smell Christmas already(thanks to the erratic thunderstorms and cool breeze)!anticipating Messiah concert and the simple family getaway.Finally can let my hair down a lil.Knitted scarf and leather boots to fall in soon!!=p

Taste of honey;
Love is assiduously doing what is best for the other,
withstands trials and the test of time,
exceeds our expecations of the other,
surpasses falling in love;
always growing in love,
Love perseveres.

Nothing beats the definition of Love which can only be taken from Corinthians 4.13..
and truism that God is Love.

Wax and wane

2009-10-03T13:19:00.009+08:00

A future of vicissitudes,
bane by disasters of all kind,
the vagaries of weather and the ramifications caused by human err,
hopefully have woken humanity-that it's impossible to vanquish God.

We seriously need to implore for mercy,repent and pray.

Whether bread always fall on the buttered side or not,
we embrace the fact that He is ubiquitous,almighty and faithful.
The insurmountable,the past and the impending is nothing;
He still reigns.

*Happy Birthday mum!*

Oxymoron-thought for the day

2009-09-16T23:36:00.011+08:00

Milieu

During Math Class, while teacher is writing on the board

Perpetual Disruptive Student A,randomly says ," We are perfectly imperfect.."

Student B replied: " wow, you finally said something that make so much sense!!!"

Rest of the Class: *****Applause****

"even so..it is well with my soul.."

2009-09-10T22:54:00.008+08:00

Picturesquely they recollect,
indelible they may seem,
the hearty,woven and seared.
Part of His purpose,
Who began a good work,
Will bring it to fruition.

“God’s work done in God’s way will never lack God’s supply. He is too wise a God to frustrate His purposes for lack of funds, and He can just as easily supply them ahead of time as afterwards, and He much prefers doing so.”

Hudson Taylor

2009-09-07T22:06:00.000+08:00

讓我像那敖雪的寒梅，不停流露出生命芬芳，
因刺骨寒風，漫漫飛雪，依然屹立，越來越香，
因我深知我信的是誰，我信的是造天地的主，
有公義冠冕為我存留，直到那日，他必與我同在，

In retrospect-boon

2009-09-02T22:10:00.000+08:00

In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps. Proverbs 16:9

Out of the boat

2009-08-16T22:35:00.003+08:00

Amid a raging storm,
he never fails us,
For those who are dispirited,
he comforts through eclectic ways.

This morning he spoke during QT,
and i was awe stricken when it was accentuated during Sermon.
It was exactly the same taken from Matthew 14:28-29,
many coincidences warrants it not to be one.

Peter challenged Jesus ,saying,"Lord, if it is you, command me to you on the water."
Jesus said,"come."

Getting out of the boat entails leaving our comfort zone,
and whatever grapple that keeps us safe.
Staying on the boat does not guarantee lifelong safety either,
especially true when a storm rages.

The solution is to get out of the boat and walk to Jesus.
In vernaculars, it is to obey,and press on with faith despite our fears,
trusting in his plan.

Finally,a taste of honey:

"It is not the critic who counts: not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes up short again and again, because there is no effort without error or shortcoming, but who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, who spends himself for a worthy cause; who, at the best, knows, in the end, the triumph of high achievement, and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat."

Theodore Roosevelt

MAD-make a difference

2009-08-15T21:56:00.005+08:00

[Dinner guests were sitting around the table discussing about their career.

A man, presiding CEO, decided to explain the problem with education. He
questioned, "What will a kid learn from someone who decides that his best
option in life is to become a teacher?'

He reminded the other dinner guests about their disposition towards teachers and said, "People who have potential to succeed in their career wont choose teaching.Those who can't, teach.'

To stress his point he said to another guest;
'You're a teacher,Susan. Seriously,what do you make?'

Susan, who had a reputation for honesty and frankness replied, 'You
want to know what I make? (She paused for a second, then began...)

'Well, I make kids work harder than they ever thought they could.

I make a C+ feel like the Congressional Medal of Honor.

I make kids sit through 40 minutes of class time when their parents
can't even make them sit still for 5 without an IPod, Game Cube or movie rental.

You want to know what I make?' (She paused again and looked at each and
every person at the table.)

''I make kids wonder.

I make them question.

I make them apologize and mean it.

I make them have respect and take responsibility for their actions.

I teach them to write and then I make them write. Keyboarding isn't
everything.

I make them read, read, read.

I make them show all their work in math. They use their God given
brain, not the man-made calculator.

I make my students from other countries learn everything they need to
know in English while preserving their unique cultural identity.

I make my classroom a place where all my students feel safe.

I make my students stand, placing their hand over their heart to say the
Pledge of Allegiance to the Flag, One Nation Under God, because we live
in the United States of America.

Finally, I make them understand that if they use the gifts they were
given, work hard, and follow their hearts, they can succeed in life.'

(Susan paused one last time and then continued.)

'Then, when people try to judge me by what I make,with me knowing that money
isn't everything, I can hold my head up high and pay no attention
because they are ignorant... You want to know what I make?

I MAKE A DIFFERENCE . What do you make Mr. CEO?'

His jaw dropped, he went silent. ]

Introspection:
As for me??? A profession,not a career.

Rat Race

2009-08-14T19:38:00.003+08:00

Thankful for all fridays,
because it's the end of the hustle and bustle.
There's certainly no free lunch.
After recuperating in my cosy corner last week,
been compelled to run the rat race this week in full-gear and celerity.
Intoxicated with stress,activated cortisols such that
insomnia became part of the routine.

The consolation is, He never gives us more than what we can bear and always know what's best for me.
Before stress manifests itself in ailments again,
was given a lil surprise treat: "much-earlier-than-expected" release from work.

need a lil more strength..

Tristesse

2009-08-05T21:56:00.002+08:00

Étude Op. 10 No. 3, in E major, in progress.

-Frédéric Chopin-

At last,stifling moments are gone,
the truth always prevails.
It has never been so clear,
every modicum of darkness skulks at His might.
Dont settle for anything lesser than what He can give.
Restoration will take place dear gal,
in His time.

cold comfort

2009-07-31T19:38:00.002+08:00

"I'd rather be an ophan than to stay with this family!", she exclaimed helplessly.

Suffering from the deprivation of love from her family,she had never
exhibited it in public except for being garrulous.
She was often a victim for blame and a good medium to dissipate frustrations.
Norminally having a home, yet akin to an ophan.
Living in desolation,the emotional and physical trauma she was
experiencing could only be inscribed in her secret diary;
the only therapy in her life now that is keeping her sane.

*Non-fiction*2009

2009-07-15T17:51:00.004+08:00

"It Is Well with My Soul" is a very influential hymn penned
by hymnist Horatio Spafford and composed by Philip Bliss.

This hymn was written after several traumatic events in Spafford’s life.
The first was the death of his only son in 1871, shortly followed by
the great Chicago Fire which ruined him financially (he had been a successful lawyer).
Then in 1873, he had planned to travel to Europe with his family
on the S.S. Ville du Havre, but sent the family ahead while he was delayed on business concerning zoning problems following the Great Chicago Fire.
While crossing the Atlantic, the ship sank rapidly after a collision with a sailing ship,
the Loch Earn, and all four of Spafford's daughters died.
His wife Anna survived and sent him the now famous
telegram, "Saved alone." Shortly afterwards, as Spafford
traveled to meet his grieving wife, he was inspired to write
these words as his ship passed near where his daughters had died.

It Is Well With My Soul

When peace like a river, attendeth my way,
When sorrows like sea billows roll;
Whatever my lot, Thou hast taught me to say,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.

Refrain:It is well, with my soul,
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.

Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come,
Let this blest assurance control,
That Christ has regarded my helpless estate,
And hath shed His own blood for my soul.

My sin, oh, the bliss of this glorious thought!
My sin, not in part but the whole,
Is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more,
Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul!

For me, be it Christ, be it Christ hence to live:
If Jordan above me shall roll,
No pang shall be mine, for in death as in life,
Thou wilt whisper Thy peace to my soul.

But Lord, 'tis for Thee, for Thy coming we wait,
The sky, not the grave, is our goal;
Oh, trump of the angel! Oh, voice of the Lord!
Blessed hope, blessed rest of my soul.

And Lord, haste the day when my faith shall be sight,
The clouds be rolled back as a scroll;
The trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend,
Even so, it is well with my soul.

Horatio Spafford

In Holy Matrimony

2009-07-06T18:39:00.011+08:00

*Adapted from Jon and Rachel's Wedding Exhortation*

Marriage was never man's idea. It was God's unfathomable wisdom which bestows this gift upon man. The instituition of marriage was for His own glory,to nurture life and to afford humanity a higher order of relationship that would be substantially representative of our relationship with Him.

To put in vernacular mathematical terms,the take-aways from the exhortation;

In holy matrimony, the equivoques of a marriage,

1+1 = 1

"For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh” (Gen. 2:24)

To be emotional,mentally,physically,financially independent of parents. Husband/wife becomes the immediate family in all circumstance.

Also,

1+ 1 > 2

Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” Genesis 2:15

Two heads are better than one, when two are united in one flesh, lives are nurtured and complements.

However,

1+1= 3

Marriage is more than a private agreement between a man and a woman. A blessed marriage has to be one that acknowledges God's sovereignty and intervention. Just like how a triangle is graphed, the nearer we move towards the vertice, the closer are the two line segments. Therefore, the closer we draw towards God, the closer the marital relation would be.

To Rachael and Jonathan : Blessed marriage (:

Novel

2009-06-28T00:03:00.002+08:00

Interesting acronym for B.I.B.L.E = Basic Instructions before leaving Earth

Trust and Obey

2009-06-23T00:20:00.005+08:00

In a split second, almost seemingly,
everything precious that you tried to keep together
comes apart before your eyes,
like a knitted sweater with a minor catch that causes the whole thing to unravel,
leaving you disarrayed.

Then,His faithful,almighty hand came to rescue,
acting as a buttress,helping to gain balance.
Struggling to stand still,
amid the tempestuous waves,
and realised,
The only palliative,
comes from Him alone.

Grateful for the graceful results.

Finishing Well

2009-06-20T16:06:00.003+08:00

Day1- Pride ( King Saul)

Not everyone who starts well ends well.

Obedience to God is better than Service for Him.

Six Steps of Obedience:

1) I hear
2) I understand
3) I remember
4) I decide
5) I do
6) I persist in doing

Value r/s with God more than honour before people.

Deal ruthlessly with pride before it hardens the heart.

Day2- Keeping out focus ( Solomon)

It is when we're at the weakest that we ask for the right thing.
Keep the main thing the main thing and stick to it.
We are nothing.
Beware of the danger of acquiring many things.

Day3- Standing strong despite rejection (Samuel)

A tall tree without a strong trunk will fall at the slightest storm.
Resist temptation to judge and blame others.
Dont become like them.
Let it pass and move on.

Day4 - Doubt( John the Baptist)

Know our focus, our story does not end on this life.
What we dont know, we leave it to the Lord.
Vengeance is not ours but the Lord's.

Day5- Failure( Peter)

Look not where you fall but where you trip.
We are forgiven by our God, so accept forgiveness.
Return to the Lord.
Learn from failures.

Day6- Finishing Well (Paul)

The end of a matter is better than its beginning and patience is better than pride.
Life mission in mind.
Clear conscience
Build lasting friendships

End of course

2009-06-12T00:44:00.005+08:00

Durian tree @ NIE

The Gift Of Friends
by Karin Schaefer

There are days when
bubbling from us comes
the innocent child within,
who giggles at the little things
and wears a silly grin.

There are days when
melancholy comes to
visit for a while;
the mind feels tired, the body weak;
we have no strength to smile.

There are days when
joy abundant
grabs a hold of you and me;
wraps us up in all it's splendor,
lifts us up and sets us free.

There are days when
sorrow wraps us
in its cloak of grief and fear,
'till our hearts ache to the breaking,
'till our eyes can't shed a tear.

There are days when
love bestows us
with its wonderment and light;
with its beauty and most of all the precious gift of friends.

The short span of 3 months was really life-changing.
The course enriched me with a spectrum of "eye-openers" academically,also manifested in interpersonal relations.
Everyday was simply too fruitful.One of the most conspicuous recall was the knowledge that durian trees exist in nie and people actually fight over durians.
Other than that,we've learnt where the "papa,and mamas"of resources stem from.
I'll certainly miss the food, and not to forget the avoirdupois gained after consuming them.

Thank You for sustaining me throughout the whole course,
and for friends that added life into my years.
It wasnt a bit easy.

We speak to nations

2009-06-01T11:06:00.000+08:00

Hear the sound
The sound of the nations calling
Hear the sound
The sound of the fathers crying

Who will go for us
Who will shout to the corners
Of the earth
That Christ is King

CHORUS
We speak to nations
Be open
We speak to nations
Fall on your knees
We speak to nations
The kingdom is coming near to you
Oh we speak to strongholds
Be broken
Power of darkness
You have to flee
We speak to nations
The kingdom is coming near to you
We speak to you
Be free be free

Hear the sound
The sound of the nations worshipping
Hear the sound
Of sons and daughters singing
We will go for you
We will shout to the corners of the earth
That Christ is King

Scars make us stronger for life

2009-05-11T12:47:00.001+08:00

I just want to run
Just want to hide away
Close my eyes to your gaze
Just want to leave
Don't want to hear them say"You're no good at this"

When the world swirls with naysayers
Broken wings and torn pages
The road ahead
Drowning in my tears
Break me open
Tear me down
Into pieces
Broken crumbs
On the ground
You can mould and shape me
In your image
Breathe your life
You know I need it
Scars make us stronger for life

Losing myself
Gaining it back again
Forging strength from weakness
All that I am
All that I'm meant to be
Melting in your hand
Let the world swirl with naysayers
Pickled hearts and sour faces
What is real is what I cannot see

Break me open
Tear me down
Into pieces
Broken crumbs
On the ground
You can mould and shape me
In your image
Breathe your life
You know I need it
Scars make us stronger for life

Cut away
All within me
That won't bear fruit
Cut away
All within me
Cut away
All within me
That won't bear fruit
Cut away
All within me

Break me open
Tear me down
Into pieces
Broken crumbs
On the ground
You can mould and shape me
In your image
Breathe your life
You know I need it
Scars make us stronger
Scars make us stronger for life

2009-05-01T19:07:00.001+08:00

deadline

–noun
1.
the time by which something must be finished or submitted

dateline
–noun
1.
a line giving the place of origin and usually the date of a news dispatch or the like.

so near ,yet so far

2009-04-28T20:54:00.007+08:00

Fluffy as he is,
two ears so very long
Sites inside his burrow
Nibbles all about the plants,
Stands on two feet,
sits to wash his face,
At a sound he stamps, and rushes,
at a surprising pace.

miss him,so very much.

Still

2009-04-26T00:38:00.000+08:00

Hide me now
Under your wings
Cover mewithin your mighty hand

When the oceans rise and thunders roar
I will soar with you above the storm
Father you are king over the flood
I will be still and know you are God

Find rest my soul
In Christ alone
Know his power
In quietness and trust

Two sides

2009-04-18T00:11:00.003+08:00

A person who is truly human is free, knows how to be himself or herself at every moment, does not give in at the slightest pressure and does not allow his or her actions and responses to be determined by the mean actions or fits of temper of others. A person who is truly human acts and does not merely react.

who said life was fair?

2009-04-05T20:27:00.002+08:00

Speaking of being fair, I wonder if our fascination with atheism is well-focused.
If Lent,the season we are currently slogging through, reminds us of anything,
it reminds us that Christians are often practicing atheists.

As I said, philosophical atheists cannot hate God. Christians,
on the other hand, know God exists and therefore can and
do hate him. One thing you do with persons you hate is pretend
like they don't exist.

We dutifully say our prayers in the morning, but then go about the day
hardly giving God a thought, making decisions and engaging the day
as if we had left him at home.

At the end of a whirlwind day, we fall exhausted into bed, and,
if we are particularly devout, we offer up another prayer.
But the picture at the center of this prayer-framed life is often blank.
Take simple moral choices.

Jesus tells us not to lust. But that doesn't stop the occasional peek at porn.
We are told to speak the truth in love, and yet we tell so many white lies,
we need an Excel sheet to keep track.

We know we should turn the other cheek, but we delight in imagining rituals of revenge.
There are unconscious sins — the thoughtless word or angry gesture that comes
out of nowhere. But then there are the deliberate sins: we have a moment to
ponder our duty, which lies clearly before us.
No question what God is calling us to do. And we do the opposite.
If this isn't a form of atheism, even of hating God, I don't know what is.

No wonder Jesus uses stark language to describe faith: We either hate
Jesus (John 15:23-24) or we hate ourselves (John 12:25).
That's what it comes down to. And we often know who "our first hate" is.
During Lent, faith becomes stark and simple for a while.
We make a small vow — let's say, not to eat sweets for the season.
It's a silly vow, which is why many eschew it, thinking it not serious enough.

But I have found that the sillier the vow, the more difficult it is to keep.
It is the very silliness of the vow that tempts one to cheat: What difference
does it make to the cosmic order if I have a piece of candy before Easter?
What's at stake, of course, is not the piece of candy, but the vow supposedly
made in love and devotion.It turns out that I apparently don't have that
much love or devotion, because I violate most vows within hours.

Lent reminds me that, for all my prayers and church attendance
and devotion to Jesus and SoulWork pontifications, I'm a practical atheist.
I let God into my life when it feels good. And when it doesn't — which is
most of the time — I pretend he doesn't exist.This would be a horrifying
reality to face up to if we didn't know another piece of news — that the
One who died for us on Good Friday died knowing he was giving his life
for a bunch of atheists. Atheists who would populate his church, and take
his name in vain. No wonder the church has such a bad reputation.

No wonder philosophical atheists hate religion.As I said, many
Christians are upset with the New Atheists, but I wonder if we
should be more riled about the old atheists, the ones found in
the pews, who proclaim their theism while living like the average
pagan.

Instead of shaking our heads at the inability of some to
believe in God, we would do well to fall on our knees in fear
and trembling, recalling that there is a God who, in word
and deed, at least believes in us.

Mark Galli

'Enjoying the land'

2009-03-27T22:17:00.003+08:00

Been a week since I started my training in NIE. Still adapting to the seemingly "interminable" time taken getting there, getting accustomed to the different blocks that are identical but yet different in faculty.Amid all these,my wisdom tooth above had to give me discomfort and an ulcer,so went reluctantly to have it extracted this evening. Thankful thing is that it's finally done after the dire apprehensions. However, suffering now from the aftermath of the anaesthetic's withdrawal, accompanied by flu=/

Rest for tomorrow's assignment-dating day.

Rainbow

2009-03-24T21:14:00.003+08:00

2 Chronicles 25: 9

The man of God replied," The Lord can give you much more than that."

Be so still................
do not settle for any lesser than what God can give.

1st day of school at NIE

2009-03-23T22:44:00.005+08:00

Just recovered from sleep deprivation due to assisting Celest's in her wedding,held 2 days ago.Eye became infected with a slight tinge of pricky sensation and a white spot surrounded by patent red veins.Managed to see a doc thankfully and was prescribed eyedrops.Waiting for healing in his own time...in the meantime i'll try to rest my eyes whenever i can, no contacts for me=/ Happened that wisdom tooth on the top right corner is forcing its way out, guess i'll have to extract it pretty soon. It's causing pain and distress,better seek help soon =/

23rd March marks the commencement of my training in NIE.Went super early to familiarize myself with the directions to the campus. Took a rough estimate of 2hours to get there.

It's not like I've never been to this side of Singapore. The warm and cosy environment that used to be unprecedentably became foreign to me. The outlook and perspective had subconsciously changed,it feels peculiar.

Nevertheless, today was a fruitful day with engaging lectures on educational psychology. Also managed to sneak up to the library during a morsel of lunch break to see Muli. Glad she's doing fine there, however feeling a little nostalgic about the times shared when we were battling assignments and exams way back in SIM. Looking forward when she joins me in the 2nd Semester. Hope she's more settled by then to continue her deferred studies.

Time for bed.
Never with sadness, always with gladness,
thanks Dad,for every little blessing, sunshine and rain.

Thankful

2009-03-06T09:24:00.005+08:00

I am thankful:
For the taxes I pay because it means I am employed.

For the mess to clean after a party because it means I have been surrounded by friends.

For the clothes that fit a little to snug because it means I have enough to eat.

For my shadow that watches me work because it means i am out in the sunshine.

For windows that need cleaning and dust to be wiped because it means I have a home.

For the parking spot that daddy finds at the end of the parking lot because it means we are capable of walking and have been blessed with transportation.

For the pile of laundry and ironing because it means I have clothes to wear.

For weariness and aching muscles at the end of the day because it means I have been capable of working hard.

For the alarm that goes off in the early morning because it means I am alive.

For hands and feet to work because it means I'm given an opportunity to extend a helping hand.

For weaknesses and flaws in myself because only then I'll be humbled.

For facing crisis in life because only then I'll learn lessons of obedience and relinquishment.

Settled, with gratitude

2009-03-02T21:19:00.012+08:00

After the past few months of boisterous relvery, followed by the start of my new and also official full time job, I've more or less settled down in my cosy working corner. Been enjoying every little morsel of my life. Still savouring many teaspoons of His love and providence that I'm beginning to have a little pouch at my belly aGAin. Though work had been occupying most of the day( as in 16-18hrs out of 24), and salary is not the most desired, nevertheless, I'm still truly grateful for this job which God had paved and open doors for me through the last school I went.

Through the years of teaching experience, I realised that God had been equipping me gradually,steadily for this current one and I believe for the ones in future. Since the time I left for the interview till now, the feelings of being inept never left me. However, just like how far He hath already led me, He would continue to do the same for days to come.

He always knows what we need and provides abundantly and exceedingly. I no longer have to raise my voice to conduct lessons, which enabled me to recuperate the harmful strains bruised during the last encountered school and my voice, though not in tip-top condition had almost regained.Thankful cos, with that, i can better serve Him, and that's the whole purpose of blessing me with this voice ya?

Besides that, I get to teach a subject which I've always been rather interested but thought it to be unrealistic and implausible to earn a stable living. Yet He is good enough to open this door for me just when i needed some direction during this transitional "growing up crisis".
To accentuate more, I'm also helping the hearing impaired girls in their mathematics. All these have added significance to my life,where great meaning florishes and bloom like flowers everyday.Can one believe, I'm enjoying the best of both worlds!!It's amazing.........how great is our God.=) It's not entirely a perfect job for everyone,but currently I'm at ease, contented with deep gratitude.

Thankful for parents who are working in the east zone..it just fit so nicely such that daddy can just send all towards the same direction..haha..of coz sleep sacrifice had to be made and everyone managed it well so far.I anticipate great fun if we all just move to the east, say near parkway parade hohoh...=p 3 months have passed..everything's relatively good,just except for the litle deprivation of sleep.Even so, my body has began to adapt to the circumscribed time of 24hrs a day with 5-6hrs of sleep.

In less than a fortnight,i'll embark on the additional trainings provided by nie which will bring more convenience when travelling to school for my night classes.Yippie..hopefully,i can pig a little tiny weeny more by then...hur hur~~~

All for now,
time for bed
YAYS and CHEERS!

Value of time

2009-02-20T08:50:00.005+08:00

To realise the value of 1 year
Ask a student who has failed his exams

To realise the value of 1 month,
Ask a mother who had given birth to a premature baby

To realise the value of 1 week,
Ask an editor of a weekly newspaper

To realise the value of 1 day,
Ask a daily wage labourer who has 10 kids to feed

To realise the value of 1 hour,
Ask the lovers who are waiting to meet

To realise the value of 1 minute,
Ask a person who has just missed the train

To realise the value of 1 second,
Ask a person who has survived an accident

To realise the value of 1 milli-second,
Ask an athlete who has won a gold medal in the Olympics

Time is a special coin that can only be spent once. Eternal value or peripherals??

Atypical

2009-02-20T08:48:00.004+08:00

2009-02-04T22:08:00.002+08:00

真爱其实很频繁,
穿频繁的衣服,
住频繁的屋子,
频繁的吵吵闹闹过日子,
然后你还是觉得很幸福

statistics 101

2009-01-29T19:26:00.003+08:00

A copy of the results of a survey done
by LifeWay Research polled 1402 unchurched adults
(defined as people not going to church in the last six months)
and found some interesting responses.

What conclusions do you draw from these responses?
71% think believing in Jesus makes a positive difference in a person's life.
72% believe that God actually exists.
72% say the church is full of hypocrites.
79% say Christianity today is more about organized religion than about loving people.
86% say I believe I can have a good relationship with God without belonging to a church.

Arthur Farnsley, administrator of the Society for the Scientific
Study of Religion interprets it this way, "Is there a workshop for
churches in being less annoying, less hypocritical?"

Key thought: If Jesus is so attractive to the majority of the unchurched, how can the church become more and more like Jesus?

Hint = It begins with you and me.

Taken from Right from the heart,daily devotions.

If only we could grow ever more united in common prayer around Christ despite our differences, we will grow in the awareness of how little divides us in comparison to what unites us.

The Reed

2009-01-11T21:06:00.002+08:00

Its stem nest
into the silhoutte
of a pregnant form
causing bruises to bloom
in the nape of its back

Worn with wear
weighed down by time
the memory of storms gone by
straddle its skin
until the peak of its blade
darkens the soil with its image

It is then the gardener
touches the single vein
running along
the arch of its back
and as he does so
it is as if a feather
finds eternal rest
in a tender breath of wind

He lays the back of his hand
under the tip of the reed
until his flesh communes with the earth
As the reed leans toward
the flesh of his palm
his other hand
forges a shell around its body

A breeze leaks through
the lattice of his fingers
causing the reed to sway
and all the while
the hands of the gardener
shelter the reed
from the full force of the wind
and the reed remains unbroken

2003 Claudia R.May

Thankful Vs Ungrateful

2008-12-31T01:38:00.004+08:00

Two people looked out of the prison bar.

One saw mud and the other saw stars.

Which describes us?

Faithful

2008-12-26T00:24:00.003+08:00

I have told you these things so that in me, you may have peace. In this world, you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world. John 16:33

baby steps, slow and steady(=

This I know

2008-12-24T22:54:00.004+08:00

There are many things I don't understand,
there are things i'll never learn;
like how the universe was made,
and why the planets turn.

There are many things I wonder about,
there are things I can't explain;
Like how the rain makes meadows green,
and why the seasons change.

But this i know, That God above is in control.
I'm very sure the Father loves me.
This i know.

There are many times my heart understands what my mind cannot believe,
For God has shown me things by faith,
my eyes could never see.

But this i know, that God above is in control.
I'm very sure the Father loves me.
This i know

You gave your love away, I'm thankful everyday, for the gift.

I wish i could tell

2008-12-23T23:08:00.002+08:00

I saw a very beautiful picture today.

People of all ages, and of many different churches coming together during this season,in unity to form CCIS(celebrate christmas in singapore) for just one reason- to share the christmas story of Jesus's birth through the distribution of booklets, acting as tour guides along orchard road with different scenes,carolling,performing in different languages, even dancing to the beat of the indian instruments, singing in tamil the carols of "joy to the world". It touched my heart alot.

The kind of joy cannot be explained. It reminds me of this familiar verse which talks about every knee shall bow and every tongue confess that he is Lord.

May the joy of Christmas be with everyone, not only just indulging in good food and wine but to know the true meaning behind this season and share it with our loved ones.

2008-12-14T21:58:00.001+08:00

I have a Maker
He formed my heart
Even before time began
My life was in his hands

I have a Father
He calls me His own
He'll never leave me
No matter where I go

He knows my name
He knows my every thought
He sees each tear that falls
And He hears me when I call

favs

2008-12-12T23:21:00.003+08:00

Been long since i had a solid game of badminton
glad and thankful for badminton "khakis" eversince sec sch days, shortpants .....and I..shorthair.haa

wonderful day!

The evidence of things unseen

2008-12-12T23:15:00.002+08:00

Takeaways from 1minute daily devotion

"Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen." Hebrews 11:1

We pride ourselves in being logical creatures
who demand proof before believing most things.
Yet, a professor can tell us that there 100 trillion
stars in the sky, and we accept it without question.
We accept as absolute fact that an atom has neutrons
and electrons spinning around a nucleus, even though
we have never seen any of them.

We know that light travels 186,000 miles a second
even though we've personally never measured it.
And we agree that Lincoln wrote the Gettysburg Address,
and that E does, in fact, equal mc2.
We accept all these things as facts without ever demanding
the proof of their authenticity.
Yet so many of us will reject Jesus - risking our eternal souls
even when presented with solid proof-The witness of thousands
of people who saw the miracles of Jesus.
Testimonies from dozens who witnessed His death,
then saw Him alive after His resurrection.
And what about the fulfillment of prophecies concerning Jesus?
Yet even after being shown so much solid evidence,
many enlightened, logical people reject Jesus as "just some myth for the gullible."
In fact, the divinity of Jesus is just about the only thing people refuse to accept, even when evidence is overwhelming.

It's puzzling sometimes how one can trust imperfect man and not a perfect God.

2008-12-11T13:03:00.004+08:00

Thank God for

1)water dispenser that had both hot and cold water

2) chance to stay with Aunty Han Ying's family again,where we received great care and had nice sharing sessions.

3) watching over us, everywhere we went, for gd health, safety mercies and keeping lizards, monitor lizards and weird insects from entering our villa.

4) wonderful moments, nice theme song and sermons that nourished our hearts with so much joy and true happiness.

5)a chance to pray tog for issues and dying -noisy -dripping water aircon in xw and jen's room. The aircon was fine after that.

6) keeping me from cramps until i came back and before heading to taiwan. almost died while vomitting tog with fainting spells in the middle of the night in the toilet. Thank God for sister and mummy that woke to take care of me.

7) and so much more

" The agony of a man's affliction is often necessary to put him into the right mood to face the fundermental things of life." Oswald Chambers

true happiness lies in contentment with what God has blessed us, not of what we still have not grasp or what we had lost.

The joy of the Lord is my strength(=

suffering withdrawal symptoms from retreat already...

13more hrs

2008-12-07T00:27:00.007+08:00

finally finished packing!phew~ beginning to feel old,or perhaps easily tired, or or....just plain lazy! hee. Nevertheless, still young at heart=p

its finally the day for church retreat. hope to be able to rest, learn,and grow. surely it's gonna be fun with them! yay~

till then,

i'll miss my dear 3Bs' :blankie,bed and bolster. hur hur~~~

sweet slice of life

2008-12-03T22:01:00.009+08:00

Life to me has been fulfilling, in so many different aspects.

When you fix your eyes on Jesus and focus on serving rather than centering on yourself, you'll sense abundance.

Especially enjoyed myself at children's camp. The most memorable part was during their praise and worship session which was held in the morning (which was the only part i went hoho). The sacrifice was that i had to lug myself out of bed very early to travel there, which i later found out was worth it. The thing is,when i do not have enough sleep, I'll just wanna be alone and return to my lala land, if not i'll RAWR=p.

But....... all lethagy were rewritten by voices of lovely children.

My eyes melted when they sang their theme song 奇妙的双手. truly grateful.

We go there as teachers but very often we return as students- they have taught us many lessons as well.

So glad to be able to catch up with Pastor Audrey too. It's been donkey years, it' always hi s and bye s and saying" we'll catch up soon" but never until now. thankful for the right time.

After that, took time off from the typical" hectic life of Singaporeans" and brought DSLR for a walk. Went around snapping, met my "not-so-old friend" on the way. Sometimes you'll discover things which you might have missed if you had company.

It was a nice day in short, though it rained like dinosaurs later in the afternoon.

back to reality,

Sure life is still tough at times and the future is always uncertain, but the number of things to be grateful for makes up for everything.

Without the assurance of God's love, i am just an empty shell, a broken puppet, disjointed and crippled. Sometimes we forget and we mistakenly believe that people around us are our sole source of security, expecting them to meet all our emotional and supportive needs when they are not meant to.

Without the love of Christ compelling us, everything we do can become an uphill task. Evangelism becomes judgemental, personal committment becomes self-righteous, church service becomes mindless and routine, bible study becomes proud intellectualism, service to others becomes tiring obligation. Only in God's presence, all disappointments and expectations are laid to rest. There we are embraced for who we are, not for what we do. This is the real me, who i am when no one is watching. This is whom God enjoys spending time with the most.

3 more days to church retreat.whee~!

more to this life

2008-11-29T23:02:00.003+08:00

Today I watched in silence
As people passed me by.
And I strained to see if
There was something hidden
In their eyes.
But they all looked back
At me as if to say, "Life just goes on"
The old familiar story,
Told in different ways.
Make the most of your own journey
From the cradle to the grave.
Dream your dreams tomorrow
Because today life must go on.

But there's more to this life
Than livin' and dyin',
More than just tryin'
To make it through the day.
More to this life,
More than these eyes alone can see,
And there's more than this
Life alone can be.

Tonight he lies in silence
Staring into space
And looks for ways to make
Tomorrow better than today.
But in the morning light
It looks the same.
Life just goes on.
He takes care of his family,
He takes care of his work.
And on some Sundays
He takes his place at the church.
And somehow he still feels
A need to search.
But life just goes on.

So where do we start
To find every part
Of what makes this life complete
If we turn our eyes to Jesus we'll find
Life's true beginning is there
At the cross where He died

He died to bring us more to this life than living and dying
More than just trying to make it through the day
More to this life, more than these eyes alone can see

"But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord." Joshua 24:15

..for you cannot have love without freedom

2008-11-28T22:00:00.007+08:00

What is the freedom to love or not love unless it is freedom to enrich or harm another?

Above all powers, above all kings
Above all nature and all created things
Above all wisdom and all the ways of man
You were here before the world began

Above all kingdoms, above all thrones
Above all wonders the world has ever known
Above all wealth and treasures of the earth
There's no way to measure what you're worth

Crucified
Laid behind a stone
You lived to die
Rejected and alone
Like a rose
Trampled on the ground
You took the fall
And thought of me

Above all

Anyone who rejects God who is perfect can also reject us someday,who is imperfect, in anyway.

lydia- In your good hands

2 Chronicles 7: 14

2008-11-28T21:57:00.004+08:00

If my people, who are called by my name will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land.

Lord Jesus, please please... intervene.... for the people suffering in India and thailand.......
You are all that we need.

mission impossible became possible

2008-11-26T22:11:00.030+08:00

A short pencil is better than a long memory.

Before my senses fail me someday,
before I choose to end up in the self- deprecating mode sometime in my life ,about the inperfections I know about myself,

i better pen down and substantiate how faithful and humorous my God is.

About a month ago, I was doing pre-exam preparation in school.Came across a girl who carried herself with a nice dress. I liked it alot, but thought it uncomfortable for the girl to share with me where she bought it because of "copy-right issues" especially between girls. So, I just simply gave up the idea of asking. I tried to search for the dress at bugis, but it was a futile trip.

A day prior to my exam, I remember watching news on channel 8. While they were in the midst of reporting, they film part of toa payoh central which they indicated at the corner of the screen. And guess what??!I saw the dress on news and i jumped for joy!!My sis commented :"crazy".

After exams ended few days later, i went to search for the dress. Feeling a little excited, but also lost at the same time because I didn't know where exactly to start searching from. After perambulating the streets of shop houses in Toa payoh central , I still could not find it. I kinda gave up and settled down for a "expectedly mouth-drooling bowl of lor mee". To my disappointment, it was vinegar noodles more than lor mee. -_-''' However, my tummy was filled, so hungry woman wasnt angry woman afterall.

I was thinking to myself: " maybe this-fashion might have, because they usually mimic apparels from all around." I text my sis for the nearest biggest available this-fashion outlet. In the end, I answered my own question and headed to Ang Mo Kio central, weaved in and out the mega stall till I look as sneaky as a thief. haha.. Derived at the same destination- cannot find!

I was about to head to school to look for my sis. So i made AMK hub the last station of my search. Scanning through, feeling cynical about finding the dress.I prayed but didnt really know how to, just told Him how much i liked the dress(anyhow it's just a simple dress) and it was perfectly alright if i didnt own it. Even before we pray, He already knows the desire of our hearts.

After having walked a significant great distance that afternoon, started water-parading until finally needed to go to the ladies. That was also when I came to the final shop.
Was comtemplating whether I should do a quick potentially futile search and head to the ladies upstairs because the one I was at were packed. I walked in and retreated so quickly that the salesperson who wanted to recommend dresses got rejected even way before she could complete her promoting.Just when i was about to turn and walk out, I SAW THE DRESS I LIKED!!!let me say once more..I FOUND THE DRESSS!! Seriously thought I was dreaming. It amazes me because I had no definite place to start with and just when I had lost all hope and had no more expectations of finding it, it appeared.

God is really good to me.

Afterall, there wasn't a need for me to have this dress. It is a bonus.=)

Next episode....to be continued=)

Introspection

2008-11-23T21:57:00.011+08:00

People become taciturn for many reasons.Some do so because it is inherently built in them. Others do so because they think they know far too much. But people who feel they have all the answers rarely bother to ask important questions.To have self-confidence is essential. However, beyong that, they cause us to stiffen up and stop to exercise critical thinking. It is like having a glass of water filled to the brim with no chance for more input. In other words, it does not allow growth in us, only pure complacency at where we have arrived.

Some things emancipate us in their departures, for the better.

food for thought

2008-11-22T00:34:00.002+08:00

Physically poor but spiritually rich

2008-11-20T22:24:00.007+08:00

如果我能完整唱一首歌，

那將是對你的感恩和讚美，

苦難中，你給我安慰，

徬徨時，你給我智慧，

雖然我不能開口唱一首歌，

我卻要對你獻上真誠敬拜，

每時刻你的手牽引我，

你慈愛使我開懷，

天上的雲雀啊，會唱的人們哪，

你們可願代我，歌頌上帝無比之美，

我願用耳傾聽，我願用心共鳴，這發自內心深處，最美的聲音，我真愛你，我真愛你

written by 黃美廉, she earned so much to sing but cant,
yet it didnt stop her from singing praises right from her heart.

............the melody harmonises the words so beautifully in one voice.......

socks

2008-11-14T00:02:00.004+08:00

Sometimes a single sock ends up missing,

and it must be somewhere in the house,

but no matter how hard i try to search for it,

it never did turn up.

It makes the other sock useless without it.

yet I cant get myself to throw it away.

It doesnt happen alot, but if it does turn up,

in the least expected place which I completely forgotten about,

it makes me 10 times happier than when i just bought them.

Maybe that's why people hang on to the sock,

because they are hoping that one day they will feel the happiness.

Promise

2008-11-12T00:40:00.001+08:00

But the plans of the Lord stand firm forever,

the purpose of his heart through all generations.

Psalms 33: 11

Irony

2008-11-09T20:24:00.010+08:00

If there is anything i've learnt all these years, it is this - the only constant thing is change. Any fortification we take refuge or comfort in on earth will fail us, someday,somehow.

We peripatetic from one desire to another, encouraged by tangible successes and pleasure.
Our achievements start to define and weigh how much we are worth.

but,how does one define real success and self-worth? Who has the every right to define?

Then again, our lives are manipulated by thrills that bring us emotional satiation, as well as lows, causing sleepless nights.

We become driven by fear and anxiety gradually trap us in bondage. We become so concerned about how people arbitrate us, and yet when faced with death, we will be willing to trade tangible successes to live one more day.

If technology aids in curing illnesses, we rejoice for awhile, reflect too little,
move on too quickly again, going after the temporals.
After getting hurt by treachery, we start inuring ourselves against the harshness of reality,
not realising that the same callousness that shelter us against being destroyed also averts us from being transformed.

We make the same mistakes over and over, never guessing that the solution lies within our hearts, not repetitious attempt to control the outer environment.

Many things may fail us someday.The only thing worth pressing on to is by achoring trust and hope in Him.

pls pls..grant me a little more strength...

Hope

2008-11-05T22:46:00.008+08:00

Every wound, every sorrow, every pain, every worry and struggle will simply fade away, for there's someone mightier, more powerful, zillion times greater than these problems. King of all kings, Lord of all lords.Mountains bow down, seas will roar, demons shudder and tremble in fear at the sound of his name. He is Jesus.

Ever Will Thy Reign Be!!!!!

Basking in his love (=

step back..disorganized thoughts..

2008-11-02T00:16:00.008+08:00

Two months have passed, there's been multitude of
reflections about life,its questions, and
the choice that I make each day.

It's like dory and nemo's dad hanging onto the whale
when there's this intuition or you call it
" whale-language" in the context of the movie,
signalling you to just let go because it brings you
freedom and safety. You don't know whether to
gravitate towards it, proceed with caution or
simply just cling on to what you know is safe.
Whether it's a jump-for-joy thing or disastrous.

Trying hard looking for clues but finding none from the most obvious possibilites and places.

In a scenario like this:

Leaving suspended anticipation in the pessismistic note.
Making the heart pump a little faster, and the mind left to wander,
restless at the same time. Voices all around seemed a little too loud so you
hesitate and decide to keep quiet, wait and observe.
You start typing a sms, clear it and type and your finger lingers
on the send button. You write a letter but it never gets
completed; you press the numbers you know by heart
but you flip the phone shut soon after.

Something is in the air, not quite ready to make its presence known............
why so difficult? So much troubles?

I know I dont have the strength to play the missing game of hide and seek.

I will not run away and lose myself in the crowd because i don't want to turn around and realise that you're not at my heels ,which means i didn't matter enough for you to feel anxious about my disappearing act. I don't look at the tail of my phone that much as I use to, cause i don't want to check the alerts to find out that it's not you who text anyway.
There are times when I don't log onto msn, b'cause i just feel safer in own silence, crying my thoughts to our Creator. Perhaps these are power struggles of useless pride and unrealistic expectations. But, no matter what,I'm here.

Another scenario:

Then again, I hear news of the famous, world-recognized leader who is also facing the question of
life's toughest- death. One that has everything you can dream about, wealth, recognition, respect and power. But then again, death is still a great teacher. However, it can come too quickly, unexpectedly to anyone.

Last one:

Masking happening even in a church context. How does one tolerate such superficiality if not for the love of God?Some knowing and seeing it through give up doing anything about it, because they know the problem will still linger on and those people just won't change- I understand. However, it brought me to tears to find out that some, even seeing through all these, still stay on,faithful in their journey, knowing that there'll always be people like these in any setting, praying and waiting for God to bring justice in His time, carrying his light wherever possible.

Like a fountain gushing down, almost drowning me,wallowing in sadness...maybe these waters will help me find the core of what I stand for, who I am- someone who has been graced with millions of blessings, showered with more love and mercy than I deserve. Looking at myself through the eyes of our creator melts all the struggle within me. All I wanna do is just to lift my hands up, shout out really really loud, to praise and give thanks. Simply because, He lives!

Quiet...

2008-10-31T01:49:00.010+08:00

There are topics with certain people in your life which you'd never converse about.
Not because they aren't in your every waking thought.
It's like trying to pin nails through wall- they sear... you understand that broaching on them might rub wounds,make matters worse instead of ,for the better...

despite best efforts to make sure we never forget:"it's the heart that matters in the end".

And across the silence, a sigh speaks everything, without a single word spoken.

Conscience.......

5 more days to exams..........meow.....

reflections...

2008-10-25T12:50:00.000+08:00

The Dangerous Game of Comparison- 1 minute daily devotions

"...for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstance..." - Philippians 4:10
An armchair philosopher once declared,
"Don't try to keep up with the Joneses.
Drag them down to your level. It's cheaper."

I applaud his creative solution to this age-old problem,
but prefer God's advice on the subject.
God tells us to just not play that game at all.
We fall into a destructive trap when we compare ourselves to others,
because the fact is, there will always be someone who has more than we do.
On Monday we are so proud of our shiny new car, but on Tuesday,
a newer one is parked in the driveway next door.
And that 48" plasma TV will soon pale in comparison to your
brother-in-law's 60" inch model with surround sound.

Here's a guarantee in life - no matter what you acquire,
somebody, somewhere, is going to have something newer,
shinier, and more powerful. So what's the harm in comparing
ourselves to others? Comparison takes our eyes off the blessings
God put into our lives. When we compare our things with others,
we get envious and can begin to feel that we deserve more than they do.
Comparison cheapens our appreciation for what God has done in our lives,
and we can easily shift from gratitude to envy.
God wants us to be content with how He has blessed us in life.

A nice song to share...

2008-10-25T12:14:00.004+08:00

Just the time I feel
that I've been caught
in the mire of self.

Just the time I feel
my mind's been bought
by worldly wealth.

That's when the breeze begins
to blow I know,the Spirit's Call.
And all my worldly wanderings
just melt into His Love.

Oh, I want to know You more!
Deep within my soul
I want to know You,Oh, I want to know You.
To feel Your Heart and know Your Mind,
looking in Your eyes stirs up within me,
cries that says I want to know You
Oh, I want to know You more.
Oh, I want to know You more.

When my daily deeds
ordinarily lose life and song,
my heart begins to bleed,
sensitivity to Him is gone.
I've run the race, but set my own pace
and face a shattered soul,

But the Gentle Arms of Jesus
warm my hungering to be whole.
Oh, I want to know You more!
Deep within my soul I want to know You,
Oh, I want to know You.
And I would give my final breathe
to know You in Your Death and Ressurrection,

Oh, I want to know You more.Oh, I want to know You more.Oh, I want to know You more...

He came to pay a debt He does not owe because we owe a debt that we cannot pay...

2008-10-22T23:22:00.004+08:00

You can fly so high....

Keep your gaze upon the sky....

I'll be prayin every step along the way...

Even though it breaks my heart to know we'll be so far apart ....................

I'm looking out the window

Where we sat to watch the stars

There's a chill within the air

It makes my heart long for your touch

You may be miles away

But as I kneel to pray

I see the same side of the moon

That we'll be looking on when the world turns blue

And know that time and space can't come between me and you

We share the same side of the moon

And though you'll never see all my tears shine through

I know I can't be that far from you

If we're both looking on the same side of the moon.

I picture you across the oceans

In your corner of the world

I pray the wind will blow my voice

And gently whisper in your ear

Your night may be my day

And though the seasons change

It's still the same side of the moon.........................

Corraine May

feelings......

2008-10-17T23:56:00.006+08:00

just came back from last lect of the year...

right side of my throat is swollen again....

tired of falling ill....seeing doc...taking med.......

tired of meeting datelines....

feel like hugging teddy tightly.....

yes I have, a baby kiehls bear........

goodnightz to all....

personal reflections..

2008-10-17T12:06:00.006+08:00

What We Treasure -fr 1 minute Daily Devotions

"...but store up for yourselves treasures in heaven,
where moth and rust do not destroy, and where
thieves do not break in and steal.
For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."

- Matthew 6:20-21

I chuckled when I read a magazine cartoon that
showed a news conference called by a
United States senator who announced
that he was divorcing his family so he could
spend more time with politics.

We may scoff at the folly of his announcement,
but the truth is that many people make
that same statement everyday.
Maybe not with words, but with their actions.

So many more, in fact, that if a politician retires
from his work to spend more time with his family,
it becomes the lead story met with cynicism
on the evening news, while the one who rejects
his family advancing his career is too plentiful to notice.
God tells us we should work hard and that
we should work heartily to the glory of God.

But He has clearly shown that we must have priorities.
Pleasing God and meeting the needs of the family must
have high priority.
Think about the priorities and the things you cherish in your life.

The Bible says that we have brought nothing into this world
and we can take nothing out of it. It's good to focus on the
things that last....

Our giftings, talents, things that we own now are all from Him,
seek to manage and use it well in His way.

14 hours later..

2008-10-16T00:02:00.007+08:00

14 hours later I'll be on stage receiving my scroll...nothing much to me though..I guess it's the

people who attend and go through tough and happy moments with you that makes it really

special..

It's also more of for parents, they feel glad and relieved that at least they had somehow "completed"

their duty of bringing up their children.

3yrs just passed like that......with all the memories of travelling to school, in school and back

from school...going into the exam hall and the waiting to go in...

how I cope with my exams during times of loss ,grief, together with a broken leg...and times

when I worked and studied at the same time...

Dont know how to describe my feelings though...

Can only thank those that walk through with me during these 3 yrs, no matter at which phase

, for the care,concerns, prayers, encouragements, reminders, help given, eg with the

assignments, printing lecture notes or just simply how to top up the cash card.

During this whole journey,you have added life into my years.

Not to forget my parents and sister, they're always around no matter how my mood swings.

They understand.

I love all of you.

To God be the glory...

It could have been the last day on earth for me...

2008-10-14T23:38:00.005+08:00

...... felt the urge to kneel down to pray.....

asking our Almighty God for mercy and grace, for blessings that overflow to the loveones around me. For health and protection against harm....

went out for dinner with family......

on the way back, this car just burge out from the left.....BMW beside us wanted to ture right..which almost banged into us. In addition, the cars behind had to pull emergency brakes which could have just crash into our car... these words cannot describe the sense of emergency then.

Thank God that His hand carried us thru...no injury at all, not even a single hair dropped.

on the way almost turning into castle green...

we witness an accident...taxi banged into motorist...police came.. everyone is alright though a part of the motor flew out..

Everything was just overwhelming...just when we least expect it to....

I believe it's not being lucky that kept us alive, it's not a coincidence that we witnessed that accident...

God can give, God can take....our lives are in his hands, so are the blessings from him.

Blessings from prayers can extend through generations...

nothing to boast but Him..

.....你还好吗

2008-10-13T22:32:00.003+08:00

若这一束吊灯倾泻下来
或者我已不会存在
即使你不爱
亦不需要分开
若这一刻我竟严重痴呆
跟本不需要被爱
永远在床上发呆
馀生都不会再悲哀
人总需要勇敢生存
我还是重新许愿
例如学会承受失恋

明年今日
别要再失眠
床褥都改变
如果有幸会面
或在同伴新婚的盛宴
徨徨地等待你出现

明年今日
未见你一年
谁舍得改变
离开你六十年
但愿能认得出你的子女
临别亦听得到你讲再见

在有生的瞬间能遇到你
竟花光所有运气到
这日才发现
曾呼吸那运气

Be still and know He is Lord

2008-10-09T23:49:00.006+08:00

Everyday they pass me by
I can see it in their eyes
Empty people filled with care
Headed who knows where
On they go through private pain
Living fear to fear
Laughter hides the silent cries
Only Jesus hears

Chorus: People need the Lord
People need the Lord
At the end of broken dreams
He's the open door
People need the Lord
People need the Lord
When will we realize
People need the Lord
We are called to take His light
To a world where wrong seems right
What could be too great a cost
For sharing life with one who's lost
Through His love our hearts can feel
All the grief they bear
They must hear the words of life,
Only we can share

So much mess in the world, one after another, in so many countries. So much stress from everywhere. So much darkness in this world, of sadness and sorrow.

When ...will ..we ..realise ...that people need the Lord....

when the dream never dies..

2008-09-28T23:11:00.002+08:00

Isn't it just like the Lord to invite me,

to put all my dreams in His hands,

Forever releasing the grip that once held them so tightly,

Forever surrendering my plans,

And then when He's certain it's not born of men,

He calls for the fire to rekindle again,

And ask me to know in my heart what's not seen with my eyes,

So that after the pruning process,

the dream never dies.

look up,lift up..

2008-09-27T00:03:00.004+08:00

Remember telling my sis that I wish it could rain today..so that I don't have to worry that I'm late for school since there's no morning assembly...

This morning when I woke, it was raining dinosaurs and elephants...haa..but only raining so heavily at yck...lol....dots...

Was about to take the escalator down frm cck station..before I could touch the ground, my hp slipped and dropped down the escalator...I was speechlesss...I guess the people who saw my hp drop right down from the escalator were even more speechless....

Today went for exam invigilation, there was this class who brought a fake roach and tried to scare the teacher during the exams..-_-'''''''''' After the teacher came out, I was given the roach,make sure they dont take it back and scare other teachers...-_-''''

Wasn't very hungry today, probably very tired that's why. Went home and took a short nap, to be able to sleep well is a luxury and blessing!!!

Woke up reluctanly from a nice rest and went for coz's 21st bday, did enjoy myself there.

back and rushing assignments again...............=S

17 Though the fig tree may not blossom,
Nor fruit be on the vines;
Though the labor of the olive may fail,
And the fields yield no food;
Though the flock may be cut off from the fold,
And there be no herd in the stalls—
18 Yet I will rejoice in the LORD,
I will joy in the God of my salvation. Habbakuk 3: 17-18

Quote of the day from staff room: Adversity is an opportunity for our souls to grow.

Dr John Gray

sunken eyes

2008-09-24T23:50:00.004+08:00

Been a busy busy week with loads of work to be done in workplace as well as in school..really cant catch up...

This morning went to work as usual, head to school, had a nice time though hectic timetable.

Went I returned home, my sister commented that I look very pale and sunken...with those "tommy sunken eyes" haha...that bad even when I slept at least 6hrs??..lol...And I was asking if I'm gonna die soon..and she said :"haha just like the theme from dying young" -_-''''''

lord,please help me surrender everything I have, and let go,coz without you,I'm nothing..may your will be done.

random randomness

2008-09-22T23:31:00.003+08:00

...when people ask me what kind of flowers do I like........ I always wondered...the answers that I usually give are lilies or sunflower bah :p cos it seems like a standard question girls have to be prepared to answer??..But after pondering and observing the surroundings recently,I finally realised that morning glory is my fav!!A plant that cant be packaged into nice bouquets haha It would lose its original beauty if its plucked off from the vines. In other words, I don't fancy people giving me bouquets of flowers,cos morning glory is my fav haha prefer to see it naturally than being plucked off, processed and packed into nice bouquets lol...

but then again, if I ever need to hold a bouquet during wedding shots or ceremonies then that's a different issue hahaaaa....

Let Go by Dewayne woods

2008-09-21T19:22:00.008+08:00

I couldn't seem to fall asleep
There was so much on my mind
Searching for that peace
But the peace I could not find
So then I kneeled down to pray
Praying:" help me please "
Then He said you don't have to cry
Cause I'll supply all your needs

As soon as I stop worrying
Worrying how the story ends
I'll let go and I let God
Let God have His way
That's when things start happening
I'll stop looking at back then
I let go and I'll let God have His way

There so much going on
Sometimes I can't find my way
And often times I struggle
Struggle from day to day
I have to realize that it's not my battle
It's not my battle to fight
I have to know if I to put it in His hands
That everything will be alright

Let go
Let God
Let go
And let God
Let go
Let God
Oh let go
And let God
Let go
And let God
My brother let go
And let God
My sister you can't handle it
Let God
Oh let go
And let God
He's the only one with the answers,
Let God
He's can handle all of these
Let God
With tears in your eyes,
Let God
He feels your pain and he knows your heart
He knows your issues,
He knows your struggles, So
Let go
And let God

nice song...=)

your grace,sufficient..

2008-09-18T22:25:00.003+08:00

Woke up at 6.20am for school as usual, didn't feel well, my throat hurt once again,nose block, heavy head, I guess I was falling sick again, after one week of recovery from the last relapse of bronchitis.

suppose to be in school to do revision with xue qi's class but went to see a doc. Doc gave 2 days of mc and told me to rest well at home.Couldnt afford to take mc coz their exams are near and had to give test and complete the last part of the syllabus.In the end, the HOD had to take care of everything. =/ didnt want to spread the germs in school too. feel so weak. Realised that when things happen, they usually come all together, just like a big bomb. And my body usually can't take it, then it'll just shut down. My weakness is revealed, but more importantly, God's power and grace is manifested through a weak person like me.

Today is grandma's birthday and she's spending it in hospital. I couldnt go down to see her cos my germs will sure spread. So only could call her and wish her, had no present for her though. Hope that one day she'll receive the best present that one can ever have. Doctor said she can be discharged by most likely next week, that's great news.

Happy Birthday grandma!

headache...

2008-09-17T23:43:00.002+08:00

1)tired,2)tired and 3)tired..Lord please grant me a little more grace and strength...

thank you so much..in Jesus name, Amen...

took two panadol and goes to bed.

things to be grateful for..Your love,more evident than ever..

2008-09-15T23:27:00.010+08:00

Sunday 14/9

Had to reach church very early in the morning to play for worship, slept very very late the night before, when i woke, daddy woke early to give me some money to take taxi, mummy woke early to make milo for me. very touched=.../
Went to hospital to visit grandma, she's much better now though still under observation, happy when she saw us,thank God for answering simple prayers.

Monday 15/9
Had a late night,monday blues and had to fight the hectic day, one retired teacher commented early in the morning: " lydia, how come you look like zombie today,no expression at all.." had a great laugh after that.thankful for the joke. One more assignment down before exams.not very well done,but sufficient enough to go through.

My fortress,my refuge

2008-09-15T23:27:00.005+08:00

[Psalms 42]

42:1 As a deer pants for flowing streams,so pants my soul for you, O God.

2 My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.When shall I come and appear before God?

3 My tears have been my foodday and night,while they say to me all the day long,“Where is your God?”

4 These things I remember,as I pour out my soul:how I would go with the throng and lead them in procession to the house of God with glad shouts and songs of praise,a multitude keeping festival.

5 Why are you cast down, O my soul,and why are you in turmoil within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise him,my salvation and my God.

My soul is cast down within me;therefore I remember you from the land of Jordan and of Hermon,from Mount Mizar.

7 Deep calls to deepat the roar of your waterfalls;all your breakers and your waveshave gone over me.

8 By day the Lord commands his steadfast love,and at night his song is with me,a prayer to the God of my life.

9 I say to God, my rock:“Why have you forgotten me?Why do I go mourning because of the oppression of the enemy?”

10 As with a deadly wound in my bones,my adversaries taunt me,while they say to me all the day long,“Where is your God?”

11 Why are you cast down, O my soul,and why are you in turmoil within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise him,my salvation and my God.

Be Still My Soul

2008-07-08T13:48:00.004+08:00

Be still, my soul: the Lord is on thy side.

Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain.

Leave to thy God to order and provide;

In every change, He faithful will remain.

Be still, my soul: thy best, thy heavenly Friend

Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end.

Be still, my soul: thy God doth undertake

To guide the future, as He has the past.

Thy hope, thy confidence let nothing shake;

All now mysterious shall be bright at last.

Be still, my soul: the waves and winds still know

His voice Who ruled them while He dwelt below.

Be still, my soul: when dearest friends depart,

And all is darkened in the vale of tears,

Then shalt thou better know His love, His heart,

Who comes to soothe thy sorrow and thy fears.

Be still, my soul: thy Jesus can repay

From His own fullness all He takes away.

Be still, my soul: the hour is hastening on

When we shall be forever with the Lord.

When disappointment, grief and fear are gone,

Sorrow forgot, love’s purest joys restored.

Be still, my soul: when change and tears are past

All safe and blessèd we shall meet at last.

Be still, my soul: begin the song of praise

On earth, believing, to Thy Lord on high;

Acknowledge Him in all thy words and ways,

So shall He view thee with a well pleased eye.

Be still, my soul: the Sun of life divine

Through passing clouds shall but more brightly shine.

something to think about...

2008-06-03T22:31:00.021+08:00

"tough challenges reveal our strengths

and weaknesses."

Adversity helps us discover

who we are.Hardships can often lead us to

examine who we are and to question what

is important in life. In fact, people who have

experienced seriously adverse events

report that they were positively changed by

their negative experiences.

One of the questions from my SAT practice book.

After reading this, it makes me recall the recent

disasters in Myanmar and China where

thousands of lives are lost through this incident.

Without adversity, will we continue to live in

complacency, to find that we are always

safe and comfortable? Especially so when

we're living in Singapore, everything is

almost at its acme.People who fall sick

can almost always be cured by the latest

technology or medicine.

The value of life seemed to have been altered.

Life "seems" to be in our control because

there is always a cure,therefore death

doesnt come to us that easily than

other people living elsewhere who

doesnt have such facilities. The mentality

might be like: " we're gonna get well sooner

or later, a matter of time, no big deal."

When we faced the natural disasters

like those of Myanmar and China,

how much does the cost of lives

really affect us? Have we been so

at ease and comfortable

in our own lives that we've became

indifferent to our surroundings?

Have we learnt all these while to just

mind our own business as long as

it doesnt affect us? Will humans be

"stagnant"-without improvement,

without suffering?

If all these didnt happen at all,

will we continue to feel that life is

still in our control? Most likely we will, for only

when we are faced with sufferings will it

challenges us and reveal to us that

we are only humans afterall;someone

out there has greater power and

control of our lives.

To what extend can something alert

and wake humans up from their

comfort zone? Sadly to say,I personally feel

that it's adversity like this, lost of

millions of lives through

natural disasters, which has ability

to impact and awaken us

so much to question the true meaning

of life and treasure it as well.

If we never ever experience unhappiness,

how can we ever understand what is true

happiness?

If ever,all our achievements are gone,

what is one thing that keeps us alive?

It is the relationship that keeps us

alive, the hope and love of family

and friends around us. What if we don't

have our family here already?

As we can see,help and comfort

are shown in tough times like this-

there is still love in humankind.

Adversity helps us to question the meaning

and importance of life.It also helps us to

treasure life and people around us.Imagine

if we're always in the good times, we'll

sometime or somehow take for

granted the things in our life-

people, health, our ability to breath.

After perservering through this suffering,

it makes us even stronger

be it in the emotional or mental aspect,

for a saying goes:"what doesnt kill us

makes us stronger ".

Just like a tea bag, if it doesnt go through

hot water, you never know how strong

it can hold itself. However, if

we choose to sit there

and grumble about why bad things

happen to us, there can be no

precious lessons

like: life is fragile and vulnerable,

not in our hands,

cherish every person with us now and

count our blessings. Everything happens

for a purpose though we may not always understand.

Are you there Lord

2008-05-29T22:12:00.002+08:00

Dear God it's me again, alone and so afraid,
I know it's late but there are many questions with no answers

People say you're gone, left us on our own,
in a world so full of sin and sadness.

I used to think you'll always be here,
I used to think you'll come for us someday.

But it's been so long since you've been gone,
and there's nothing i can hold on.

Are you there Lord, do You care,
can You answer my prayer
Aba Father can you hear me, tell me how to believe,
Cos why does it seem, that its just an empty dream
And i need to know if you're still here, for me.

I look ahead and see,
a future that's so grim,
like a road that just goes on and doesnt have an ending.

People everywhere are cynical and scared,
not knowing who to turn and who to trust in this confusion.

I'm only looking for a sign,
I'm only searching for an answer.
BUt it's been so long since you've been gone,
And there's nothing I can hold on

Are you there Lord, do You care,
can You answer my prayer
Aba Father can you hear me, tell me how to believe,
Cos why does it seem, that its just an empty dream
And i need to know if you're still here, for me.

Lame things to share

2008-05-22T22:53:00.003+08:00

Was doing my last relief teaching before school closes for holidays.Came across the P6 boards and found a series of creatively stupid,mean,funny,lame stuffs that the students came up with.

First one: Teacher:How old am I?
Student: 28years old.
Teacher: How do you know?
Student: My ugly sister is 14 and she says that you are twice as old and twice as ugly.

2nd: Student:My baby brother is good in maths.
Teacher: How you know?
Student: He knows what 3-3 is.
Teacher: But that is nothing.
Student: Precisely, that's why he is quiet.

3rd: Teacher: What are 3 fav words of a student?
Student: I don't know.
Teacher: There you go, you got the answer!

4th: A　还是　C　比较　高？
　　　Ans: ABCD

5th: How to ask the bee to watch out??
Ans : Bee- ware -_-'''

6th : Once upon a time, there was a genie who came by 3 working man. The genie asked what were each of the three man's wishes. 1St man came by and said :" I wish I could go somewhere nice and retire there." And his wish was granted. 2nd man came by and said: " I wish I could go for a nice holiday and live there happily ever." And his wish was granted too. The 3rd man who came by who happen to be the boss said:" I wish that those two idiots fly back now and attend the meeting at 1.30 sharp. And his wish was granted too.
What's the moral of the story???

And : Always let your boss speak first. =p

Miss Eygptian(King Pharoah's daughter look-alike)

2007-10-07T20:00:00.000+08:00

5/10/07 3.25pm Memorable day for ah toot's hair =p

10yrs of short hair for pri n sec sch..
6 yrs of long hair thereafter....

NOw back to short hair!!!hehee

TA DAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

yeah so nw i look like dollie or some say Eygptian haha..make it King Pharoah's daughter ..sounds better hahaaa-_-''''''

Mr Jason toot having his right foot fractured from combat exercises...already sprained right leg ended up fractured cos left leg stepped on it *laughs*

who looks younger??

i think it is still me lar...wahahaha=p

The potter's hand

2007-10-02T17:51:00.000+08:00

Beautiful Lord, Wonderful savior

I know for sure all of my days are held in your hands

Crafted into your perfect plans

You gently called me into your presence

Guiding me by Your Holy Spirit

Teach me dear Lord to live all of my life

Through your eyes

I'm captured by your holy calling

Set me apart.

I know you're drawing me to yourself

lead me, Lord. I pray

Oh Take me, mold me, use me, fill me

I give my life to the potter's hand

Oh Call me, guide me, lead me, walk beside me

I give my life to the potter's hand

Finally!!

2007-08-21T23:53:00.001+08:00

finally!!! today i finally got called down to do relief @ my ex-students school.Was

asking my student to leave

my particulars to a tcher there in case they needed relief.previously they said they

didnt need, was quite sad

but din occur to me that i will ever get there..but today they called me!to me its a

miracle!!today another sec

sch oso called me at 6plus but i was so tired to travel there..then suddenly the fone r

rang again..n wen they

told me its deyi sec,i couldnt believe !..n jumped up from my bed n get my best outfit

muahaha..so i'm not so

tired after all wen i know i'm able to meet up my students ya?!!?HAHA i din inform

them thru sms ..wanted to

give them a surprise!!Wahaa in the end,i succeeded muahahaha..it's been 3 yrs since

i taught them,realli miss

those times in sch with them,it's SO fun!!of cos they can be very naughty at times,but

they still love n respect u

de!when i saw them..esp those guys who grew so much taller..i almost couldnt

recognise them!!!i just din noe

what to say,wanted to cry..i dunno why i was so touched??maybe cos like teach them

from young then when

they grow up,n doin fine though academically or behaviour not very gd but they still

respect u alot n not

other teachers..u feel a sense of achievement cos u win their trust...n in their

hearts..u r still their miss

tan..wah tis kinda feeling is hard to describe..all i noe is that they are also friends to

me!hEHEH some fotos to

share.

This was me 3 yrs ago..aiyoyo..soo tooott

Kelvin n Le yi

Le yi n meee

can u recognise who is she from the past foto?? so pretty nw!i think we look the same age

muahaa ,she's onli sec 3 ..can u believe it hAAA

my beloved ex-students n present too haaa,was wearing very high heels so end up

same height

as the guys..they r actually taller than me liao..

3 Years b4 she was only pri 6

3 years later... she is sec 3 le haaa..

Yiling n I

Me n brendan=) (sorry brendan..i dunno why i coulnt find ur young foto..i remem

taking foto with u..)

TEaching in a different environment

2007-08-05T22:31:00.001+08:00

Recently by His grace-thru a fren, managed to try teaching relief in 2 secondary schools.
Experiences were great.in fact i kinda enjoy teaching secondary than primary.There's pros n cons but guess no matter where i will be posted to,it's the passion of teaching that is more impt n hopefully don't distinguish.

If God allows,i will graduate after my nov exams and get into NIE next july.

Few experiences in the secondary school A: was outside sec 4J classroom,class door was locked,music was blasting inside the class,lights were off, student sit at teacher's table,both legs kiao until so high HAA! other students were at the class beside them..there was a tcher inside,teaching away..but the rest jus stay behind n talk n play,walk out the class as n when they like..no use asking them keep their mp3s,nor threaten to take their handfones away-many esp guys r so tall..bigger size.one box by them u go Home.no wonder so many teacher's on mc n need relief teacher.haa

Took a deep breath..n den ask them to unlock the door....the guys jus browse me top till toe n communicate to one another in their mother tongue,wont be surprise if its something dirty.so did the ah beng looking guys on the other side.

Another Sec 1 class was also enough to kill my voice.the class was so noisy..fly aeroplane..change sits..walk here n there,shout about..until another tcher came in to punish those who misbehave.
of cos did scold them until one student asked if i'm from npcc-_-''' was abt to laugh but cant.

Solution for lower sec:go outside the class pumping position stay there 5 mins.recover after 5mins or lesser if they behave.i tried tis wen i went to another class..it works la..but didnt wanna do tt..cos it's very bad...but very effecitive for lower sec.

Solution: Be their friend yet firm,be patient,understand them without a judgmental eye,they will behave if they trust you and are comfortable with you.Cant teach like u teach in pri sch,all the scolding n ordering ard wun work de.

That's what i've experienced n learnt so far haaa..

Cons:
Very difficult to get homework back unlike pri sch.almost wun get back de..more complicated things to mark-more time consuming.lol.
cos they dun wanna do reali no one can force them de..
many bcos of their family problems or financial needs n bad company they choose to go astray..even though they know what's good for them.

School B: Sec 2 class,boy punches boy for provoking abt prostitutiong.. needed to hold back the boy who was same height as me,very strong..was so scared loR.. shouted in his ear calm down oso no use den must shout twice"calm down!i will scold him". then he cooled down.thank God the frens pulled the fat boy who provoked him away..if not i think he die liao...haaa

Sec 3 classes,those who wanna learn will learn,those who dun wan just take their handfones n mp3s out to listen..they dun care who u r..cos they know u r onli there for a day..cant do anything to them.

Early in the morning hear whistling sounds..someone shouts"chio BU"-_-''''' tis is sec sch.
Everyday is fun,challenging n live-changing!moulding of lives is fulfilling task that perhaps God put a burden in me.

Another plus point..many young teachers in sec schools..no generation gap..so can communicate better..many christians teachers too..who have the same vision.One thing i learn from them when i ask how do they manage the class..one tcher whose church is near ours said"spiritual"He was talking abt God haaaa he oso added"it's God's grace that they already willing to change into their pe shirt n line up outside" Another christian tcher said by Grace.Patience is not enough,God's grace is.SO cool lOR summore they all so young so fun..they do meet out n chill oso!too bad tis sch is too far from my hse haaa...unless i hv a car..

aniwei tis post is too long le.Thank God for all experiences!they happen for a purpose.

Everyday is Grace

2007-08-02T01:12:00.000+08:00

BEsides having all the fun, really need to ask God for mercy for people who are suffering

persecution in Afganistan-those korean volunteers.SInce everyday whatever will happen is

already in God's plan and it will happen..we can only intercet n pray for them..reminding us that

humans are really very limited.I really can't imagine if i am one of those being captured.It's very

easy to lose one's faith in times like this.U wun know what the terrorist will do to the

people..eg.skinning one's skin alive,torturing them slowly-will we deny God or stand firm on our

faith?In times like this if we are them,how will we react?It's hard to imagine the kind of pain

they are going through, when humans are hungry,they can even eat one another up for own

survival,what will we do if we were there?.And for the women there,we won't know what the

man did to those women..eg.rape them then kill....hai..heavy heavy heart..All we can do is to

ask for God's mercy and to send his mighty army of angels to protect all of them...and for His

glory to be shown in this incident,though we cant see anything gd in this nw.But no matter what

we pray, their lives are still in His hands,He has soverign control.They are really brave!Cannot

picture how devastated the parents would be..your own child..being captured n can die

anytime.Parents usually ask:" why do u have to go,when it is so so dangerous,risking own

life..let someone else go lar." Perhaps we won't understand their kind of fear..their love for their

child until we have our own kids.Who wants their own child to die? Yet somebody has to go into

the mission ground no matter how dangerous..It's hard to balance, really need wisdom from

God. If God ever wants to send us, will we love Him enough to go or will we love our family more

that we wont respond to His calling.

Fruitful holiday=)

2007-07-29T22:03:00.000+08:00

Tommy,lydia,william,angela,zhifeng(too tired after book out)hehe

one of my fav foto=D

can read wad word?its stands for us..haa

SMS me the ans..got prize ha

Meng mian chao ren

YUMMY DONUTS!!!!droolz...

VIVo city taking pics..so vain haa

Common friends gathering bet QBC n Huai en tang n CVCF

My ex-students frm P6..now sec 3 le..time reali flies.=p

Fixing my beetle car..still under construction haa

no money buy big one so buy small one first haa

Another small meet up with choirmates

Felicia n I-sec sch class mate=)

JC choir com gathering=)

Jap food cooking day @ my place=)

BBQ @ my place=)

No money stay hyatt hotel so only can take fotos there haa!

Durian feast @ my place=)

Common friends outing

Cousins n my grandma=)

Celebrating my mum's bro=uncle's birthday

2So8 sister's class gathering Tagged along my sis class gathering as always hehe

Taken during church retreat at Genting highlands

Fun time at sentosa!=) also the day where hse no electricity n water,n my exams results r out..haa THANK GOD for grace!did unexpectedly quite well after hardwork too=)

Liting n I

This whole holiday was fruitful and blessed,could attend church retreat and learnt alot,meet up many long lost frens,had time to serve God more,had time to work and play and rest!=)

Habakkuk 3:17-18

2007-06-03T00:36:00.000+08:00

Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines,though the olive crops fails and the fields produce no food,though there are no sheeps in the pen and no cattle in the staus.Yet i will rejoice in the Lord,I will be joyful in God my savior.Habakkuk 3:17-18joice in the Lord,I will be joyful in God my savior.Habakkuk 3:17-18

Lord Lord...pls give me more courage to go thru all these...

Thank YOu Lord

2007-05-30T00:21:00.001+08:00

Thank you Lord that u carried me thru another half a sem of classes and exams...

that i didnt fall sick during my exams until nw...

that the nodue is until control still..

for sustaining me thru the fruitful week and that i had strength to go for the global prayer day

that i can go church retreat...

almost couldnt go cos my passport expired and i was so careless didnt check earlier..until monday when i went to ICA they said i had to make new one,n my heart suddenly dropped out cos i dunno if can collect in time BUT thank God,the collection date is saturday,2 days b4 the retreat!phew!BY HIs grace..really....

Nodue

2007-05-10T00:43:00.000+08:00

Yest(tue)was on the way to church for sunday worship prac..was looking at my palm..and then i felt there was a sharp lump at the last finger there...i thought it was just xing1 li3 zuo4 yong4..then i feel my right hand last finger..dun have leh...then i went to church n ask li yi if she felt anything and she said yes. TOday i went to see a doc to clear my fears...she said it was a nodue..according to the definition i found online, it is a small swelling or aggregation of cells, e.g. a small tumour, node, or ganglion, or a swelling on a root of a legume containing bacteria.

She said my tendon was kinda dislocated..due to over work of my fingers...n asked what work load did i exert too much.i said playing the piano..she ask me to stop playing piano for this period of time. I recalled,perhaps last few months i had been playing the piano,guitar and violin..everyday will spend some time to prac..plus holding those heavy books of the students during relief..perhaps over strained my finger...hmm..she gave me medicine hopefully to shrink it..if not have to go op...Ahhhhhhh i dun wish to if possible..=/ cos i dunno if the op itself will affect my playing of the piano next time...=/ but well well..God is in control..i just do my part..i'll be guai n rest my hand well ba....can take tis time to dun do housework lol!!!!! jk..

Aniwei a sentence i came across this Christian book..which says" you never know how much you really believe anything until its truth or falsehood becomes a matter of life or death to you" by CS Lewis. He wrote tis in his book when his wife had bone cancer.
It's really true..our faith and obedience in God is often tested thru the many trials in life..sickness,heartbreaks etc..it is when such circumstances exist that enables you to live out real true faith.It is in such circumstances that brings a person down back on their knees(at least for myself) to acknowledge and be reminded that God is in control of our lives.He can give whatever we pray for(not that He is obliged to but He gave becos he loves to give gd gifts to his children)yet he does take away things which He deem not best for us. Therefore..obedience and submission is the only way out to freedom,real peace. Another qn to ponder upon is with regards to all prayers.."if God doesnt give us what we pray for or that everything is taken away from us,will we still love Him??"not easy to ans esp when life is smooth sailing.
It's even more of a challenge to have a thanksgiving heart in the mist of trials than in the mist of a smooth sailing life.
alright i shall stop here. a personal reflection haa...
feel so auntie..so naggy haa...God bless all!!Take cr of yourselves!!

The prayer

2007-05-06T23:20:00.003+08:00

I pray you'll be our eyes, and watch us where we go.
And help us to be wise in times when we don't know.
Let this be our prayer, when we lose our way.
Lead us to a place, guide us with your grace
To a place where we'll be safe.

La luce che tu dai
Nel cuore restera
A ricordarci che
L'eterna stella sei.

I pray we'll find your light,
And hold it in our hearts
When stars go out each night,
Remind us where you are..

Nella mia preghiera
Quanta fede c'e.
Lead us to a place ?

Let this be our prayer
When shadows fill our day
Guide us with your grace

Give us faith so we'll be safe.

Sogniamo un mondo senza piu violenza,
Un mondo di giustizia e di speranza.
Ognuno dia una mano al suo vicino,
Simbolo di pace...di fraternita.

La forza che ci dai
E desiderio te
Ognuno trovi amor
Intorno e dentro se.
Let this be our prayer,
Just like every child.

We ask that life be kind
And watch us from above.
We hope each soul will find
Another soul to love.
Let this be our prayer,
Just like every child.

Needs to find a place, guide us with your grace
Give us faith so we'll be safe
E la fede che hai acceso in noi
Sento che ci salverai...

全心赞美

2007-04-26T23:23:00.000+08:00

Kaifu's CD is finally out.=) Let me share more about the purpose of the CD and how our gracious God had carried all of us thru. Since last year August, Kai fu approached a few of us to join this ministry.Through much prayer, we formed a team of 3ladies and 2 men namely: Kaifu, Derong,Li Yi,Jiayi and myself. The starting of this whole CD producting was not at all easy. For one reason, it was because all of us had no real experience in Cd recording despite being musicians in church for some time. Anyway, we gathered and started our first meeting during the time of music space.As some would know,the process of making a cd has many many stages..plus all the admin stuff. As many in the church would have known, Kaifu has been composing many many nice Praise and Worship songs for the past 10 yrs and his songs have got the ren tong of fellow bros n sis in the church.

The vision in mind when he approached us was to actually collate all these songs into a CD as a start. To bring these songs to chinese churches in singapore, so as to enable them to have another choice of worship songs to use in their churches. This minstry is non-profitable, is based on commitment to serve in this new ministry despite their full time jobs and commitments,and of people who paid the full cost of the cd production with their own money,hoping to fulfill the vision of our ministry. This CD is not under church directly because of those tedious admin matters. However, it is with full support of the church and pastors of the church. People might be asking how come only Kaifu's songs?? This is because since we have no experience in cd making and since cd making is tedious,like arrangments of the songs etc..therefore it is easier to start with one person's compositions so as to make things easier as a start in terms of executing the plans.As of next time, if God continues to open doors for us, we will be able to record other new compositions as well.

As this is the start of the ministry, the CD may not be perfect and may not reach certain people's expectations, however, it is our prayer that God can use us in this cd to bring blessing to churches in Singapore. We really do need support in action and prayer in this new ministry. This coming sunday will be the official launching of the CD. The cost of the CD is priced at a reasonable rate of $15.Really hope that you all can support this ministy.I currentl have CDs with me,so whoever wans a copy can info me.Although there will be a booth tis sunday, but u can get the CDs earlier from me. Thinking of a gift for non-believers and friends??this Cd will be a gd idea haha..=) In this cd, all our team members sang.Including jia ka yee haha...=)

LEt me share some experiences that every single of our team member went thru and how GOd sustained us. Last year, everybody knew i broke my leg la..haaa..and couldnt start prac n recording until much later..but the team still supported me in prayer n with many concerns..during that low period,everytime i was down..someone in the team will amazingly, thru their words or actions encourage me. I came to a point that i can only be so grateful and thankful and was praising GOd even in the mist of suffering.He had blessed me with so nice bros n sis..wad more can i ask for??how ungrateful n complainisome can i continue to be??my heart was changed and...i thanked God!

Next Jiayi kept falling sick due to the heavy workload in her sch.Kaifu and family also kept falling sick due to flu viruses and stuff..

And then Li Yi underwent an operation in the mist of recording. The day before her op we had recording.We were recording 主我爱你. When she was recording..n we were listening..i was super super touched ...touched by the fact that despite the op the next day, she could still have joy in her and still willing to come down for recording..she even brought us nice nice cakes.I see so much unity in the body of Christ.Such a wonderful beautiful pic..i was down that day..but when i saw that kind of heart to serve...i thanked the Lord..and i am super super greatly touched and encouraged by her.

Not long after...during JTTW musical...Derong's dad suddenly passed away. It was a heavy blow..to him especially. However, as Christians, despite the uncertainty of future, we have hope, a hope that is enternal and won't perish...that is we will all be with Jesus one fine day and so will he see his dad. In the mist of all these pain, he still committed and came down for recordings. It's really another learning point and encouragement to me.

Even after the recordings have completed,there were so many obstacles to this production...however thru prayer , God's mercy and grace was sufficient in our weaknesses and short-comings.We pulled thru....and until today, the CD is out.It cannot be taken for granted even to the printing and packaging of the cd to be perfectly without fault coz we cant assume that everything always comes out the way we want. Even till the perfect printing this time, it is really by God's grace. It's really amazing how everything happened.All Glory and Honour and Praises be to our Almighty,everlasting,sovereign God.

It's amazing how the extraordinary God can use ordinary people like us. hope that bros n sis and support us in this new ministry. thank you very very much for reading =)

Su lao tai is back with God.

2007-04-21T01:54:00.000+08:00

Today when i was studying outside,i received msges from kA tai.It was to inform us abt Uncle Daniel's mum-Su lao tai's wake.God took her back to Him this afternoon.My heart was quite heavy after the news.EVen though i know all along these past 2yrs 8 months she's been diagnosed with stroke.This year new year sunday when the pastor asked everyone to shake hands n send greetings..i felt a great urge to go shake her hand n give her a pat on her back.I dunno why nowadays seem to put more notice on old ppl..isit that i am oso ard there le?hmm but aniwei that's not the point..i didnt know that was the first and last hand shake that i gave to her.

The reason why i am blogging about this pioneer old lady is not because she is uncle Daniel's mum.It's because she really left a deep impression.It's one of the reasons why i am still serving in church. As the people closer to her will know Su lao tai's heart to serve GOd and always encouraging people to serve God in all ways.When i was sec 4..i remembered my mum does usually chat with her de..she was a teacher in the past..so i guess my mum n her had common topics to talk abt. My mum always ask me to greet her de..so i do as she says ..usually mummys r like that ya..always tell u must greet ppl.I will always remember what she said to me that time."事奉神好，看到你弹琴事奉很好。。要继续。” Seeing church old ppl's heart for God encourages me alot these 1-2yrs.I mean although there are alot of technologies that they can't catch up with..generation gap..however i believe they are the ones who looks thorougly at the church bulletin n esp under the prayer list sections and prays for us.They are our examples of how we should seek God and work for him in the yrs that we do live.

Today the whole of the xiao li tang classrooms all opened up for the wake.Many ppl came to pay their respects.....i was kinda shocked...n definitely in all her yrs,ppl must have seen the example of Christ in her..and made an impact in their lives.It is also my prayer that one day wen God takes me to my real home..there will also be that many people who comes..not because of who my father or mother is .but that the character of Christ is seen in me. The only hope that Christians have in suffering is that God conquered death and one day He will come to bring us back to our real home.

Thank you Lord

2007-04-18T23:28:00.000+08:00

Thank God that God answered prayers of brothers n sisters and had mercy..My grandma is already back to the normal ward though the intake of CO is still unstable in her body.But glad to see her able to talk and smile already..

Aniwei the phantom of the opera is AWESOME!!!!!!i wanna go for second round REALLY that good!tis time i dun wanna pay 70 n sit on the 4th level..n phantom is only 15cm to me..rather pay more to catch such a worth it musical..the last time they came was 10 yrs ago..i dun hope to wait till 10 more yrs or never to watch it..haaa..by 10 yrs i wld hv been 33 le..if i am still here.lol.PPL go catch phantom!!!really great!!!!

From a pri 3 boy.It's la4 bi2 xiao3 xing1..tommy's fav!lol...so cute right...can u see the words in brown??haaaa...lol..

Grandma admitted to ICU today

2007-04-10T22:07:00.000+08:00

Yesterday night,i heard from my sister that my dad's mum.my grandma was admitted to hospital again.I was praying so hard the sch dun call me today as well so that i can visit her n the other grandma.The last time she fell during her sleep,fractured her nose bone and was admitted to SGH.This time 1 week after she was discharged,she was admitted againcos she had couldn't eat and breathe properly. Today my sister and I went to Mount Alvernia Hospital and was expecting to see her in the normal ward.Actually after visitation,wanted to make a trip down to my mum's mum hse.my other grandma hse to visit her as well.

However,when we got there, we couldnt find her, checked with the nurses and they said she was just sent into ICU(intensive care unit)We searched for quite some time and finally found the place, when we saw her..she was bed-ridden,unconscious and had many many machines and pipe through her mouth and nose and hands. Her hands were tied up to disable her from pulling out the pipe out of uneasiness.My heart suddenly sank right down.........................her heart rate was very unstable..her whole body was actually jerking..like having feats like that yet unconscious.at that time ,my uncle n aunties havent reach..onli two of us...we were so scARed something bad might happen.we tried to call her...even when she was unconscious.....=/ my sis asked the nurse if it was very serious and the nurse said yes. All we could do was stand there helplessly praying, look at her in pain....she had tears in her eyes..even when she was unconscious. The doctor came.He said she had too much carbon dioxide in her body and the exchange rate of taking in the oxygen was very slow that's why too much CO2 caused drowsyness.So was trying to pump in oxygen for her to breathe...heard tt they found out her lungs not good oso,had Puenomia. After that, my grandma's pastor came.He talked to her..and encouraged her with God's words...ask her not to worry..tell God our worries...God can hear..He is our shepherd..and prayed for her.I saw that she had tears flowing down.....show that she can feel something yet cant respond to us. Hai..

Went back to the hospital at night and seen her again.Her condition is much better..she regain her consciousness however cannot respond still..still under observation in ICU. The plc is so cold..esp for old ppl..it's like so much to take beside the pain from the machines.Wen we got there..she keep pointing n ask us to free her hands..cos i mentioned it was tied...to prevent her from taking the pipe out of her mouth. The nurses fastern the hands even tighter cos she almost tore the pipe away from her mouth..SIGH .She had to have the pipe in her mouth for her good..but she just wanna take it down.hurts alot to see her in this state.

From this yr onwards...during chinese new yr wen i saw this grandma...i could see from her eyes that she was very lonely. Of course her children visited her..yet not often enough cos of work..busyness.HOwever how much time had we got with our grandparents??are we spending too much time on work and friends and earning lotsa lotsa money to give them but nv fufill the emotional needs of them?DO we have to wait till they r gone before we regret??when was the last time we visited our grandparents or called to ask how they are??

It is God's mercy that He answered prayers and she is still living.As He is soverign over every breath that we take.

9/4/07 ZHi feng's enlistment.

2007-04-10T21:57:00.000+08:00

Last hairstyle before NS.hee

To any who is concerned=D.ZHifeng went into tekong le..with cute little yi le and us of coz.hee..heard from him that he had settled down.Everything is fine.His first book out will be on the 26th of April.LOng holiday up till 1st of MAy.=) Huimin asked yi le if he wanna dang1 bing1..n yi le asked ma ma to go dang bing.hAAAAA so cute.

Beau-tee-ful song

2007-04-06T23:53:00.000+08:00

银色小船摇摇晃晃弯弯悬在绒绒的天上

你的心事三三俩俩蓝蓝停在我幽幽心上

你说情到深处人怎能不孤独

爱到浓时就牵肠挂肚

我的行李孤孤单单散散惹惆怅

离人放逐到边界

彷佛走入第五个季节

昼夜乱了和谐潮泛任性涨退

字典里没春天

离人挥霍著眼泪

回避还在眼前的离别

你不敢想明天

我不肯说再见

有人说一次告别天上就会有颗星又熄灭

Fashion show

2007-04-05T01:25:00.000+08:00

Princess haa

This is Joanna and I.Joanna is my Sec sch fren since sec 1,choirmate and eventually neighbour same block

onli haaa..and lastly how can i miss out?..my dear sister-in-Christ =D Wanted to borrow a top from her for my

sis bday lol..so went to her hse.Been long since i went to her hse.When i reached there.i saw how much clothes

she had..it's like a mini shopping mall!!!!serious..not exaggerating lor..haa.i realised she has like

30++dresses..dresses alone only leh!!!!and more than 10 belts..like 20 i think..and 20 pairs of shoes and so

many so many so many necklaces n ear-rings n many many more tops and pants..aiyo even i cant stand it..it's
realli too much!!too extreme..shopaholic..cant stand it..Anyway,since i havent

had Fashion show for very long on my own(use to have fashion show in my little hm whenever i felt like it

lol...) and moreover both of us realise we seldom have fotos tog..so used this chance to take them..hee so

these 2 xiao za bor spend like 2 hrs..taking foto..from 11pm -1am!!!!haaaa so fun!!!!!!but tiring..need to keep

changing out of clothes..of all styles haa...but the lighting is not gd n the camera has its own limits..hmmm so

kinda not very nice the turn out..but glad i met her n had fun time playing tog..haa like those little girl's

play.hee

thats abt it..enjoy e fotos=ppp I feel like my writing is more n more like my pri 5 student's essay haaaaa didnt

watch grammar n vocab plus all the singlish lol...actually have so much things to blog abt.but next time ba

hee.take cr everyone!=)

Thank God for everything.

Fashion show

2007-04-05T01:16:00.000+08:00

Safari funky haaa

Retro

Sweet=pp